There are moments when the truth just stares you in the face.  One of such moments is when you see a man and a child standing side-by-side.  Let’s assume it’s a boy, since it’s more common to see a little boy sporting a haircut than a girl.  With some exceptions.  The haircut is important because it allows you to observe the head shapes of both parties without any distractions.  Suku (Yes that Shuku hairstyle) is a distraction.  By the way, I won’t spend this entire post talking about head shapes.  But let’s just play along.  Let’s say it’s a man and a boy.  You may not even see their faces.  In fact, there’s no need.  A mere glance at the father’s ipako (back of head) or ogo and the child’s own will bring you to this conclusion:

This boy is the true son of his father!

Curve by curve, slope by descending slope, it’s hard to miss. The son’s head resembles his father’s own.  Like they say, the resemblance is uncanny.

After comparing their head shapes from a distance (I can only hope you won’t use a ruler or tape rule for mathematical accuracy), you think to yourself:

“There’s no way this man can deny that this is his son,” especially if the father’s head is shaped like he swallowed a whole yam tuber that never made it to his throat.

You know what I mean jare.  Don’t make me draw a picture, please.

Now if the father has a well shaped head (Definition: You don’t keep gawking at it with an open mouth until you fall into the gutter), then there’s no wahala.  So, when people make comments like, “Chai, dis pikin resemble im Papa too much!” You (the mother of the child, a.k.a Mother of Bobo) will congratulate yourself inwardly (or outwardly; Don’t worry, we won’t judge you) on your good fortune in bearing a child with an enviable head shape.

And when people say “Aunty, you carry eye go market o!” or “E gboju lo s’oja,” a compliment usually offered to men who pick beautiful wives, we will understand why you’re beaming with pride.  They are telling you that you made a good choice in marrying and/or having a child with Bobo’s father.

Yes, sometimes fatherhood and marriage are mutually exclusive.  We understand.

But if Bobo’s father’s head more closely resembles the yam tuber scenario, and Bobo’s head now resembles his father’s own (because who else will a child’s head resemble), then Madam ….

*clicks tongue disapprovingly and shakes head slowly*

Wahala dey!

You see, people talk, and Nigerians like to offer their unsolicited opinions all the time.  So, Mama Bobo, if your own is more like the 2nd scenario, then be prepared for comments like:

“Aunty, na for where you meet this Uncle? Your eye dey pain you that day, abi na apollo no let you see im head well well?”

If … No, when this happens, we won’t judge you when we see you chasing  the offensive commenter away with a broom and dustpan. If we are even judging you, we will keep our comments to ourselves because we don’t want to add our names to the list of “The Chased.” But deep in your heart, you’ll know that the commenter has spoken the truth.

Love is blind, abi? Wear glasses!

Should I stop here? No way! Believe it or not, I didn’t plan to dedicate an entire post to head shapes.

For physical traits like shape of head, color of eyes, etc, we expect children to resemble their parents.  In fact, it doesn’t surprise us.  It’s hereditary, we say.  Genetics at work.

But what about personality traits?  Can they be passed on from parent to child? Yes, it’s the whole nature v. nurture debate again, so there are different opinions as to the right answer.  Some believe personality traits are non-genetic while others believe they can be inherited.

Why is this important?

Because if negative personality traits can be inherited, then you should be careful who you choose to marry.  Or have a child with.  If uncontrollable anger or a nasty temper, for example, isn’t the sort of gift you want to give your children, don’t marry a person who has those traits.

Do you agree or disagree? Please share your thoughts!

*Image Credit: Verywell.com